Monday 23 February 2009

Normality may be the death of me


Sometimes I just can't please myself. About a year ago I was being told I was losing my job, and that put me on a terrifying (on the more dramatic days, if not, just annoying) road of uncertainty. I know there's the whole 'tortured artist' thing, where the artist has to struggle before finding success, but I'm generally on the side of Kevin Rowland from Dexy's Midnight Runners with this - Old Clothes To Not Make A Tortured Artist. And I rather like having nice clothes, and other nice things - I feel they make me happy, and a happy Paul is a better writer/musician Paul. Now, here we are a year later and things seem to be verging on the happy side of things again. Work are expecting to offer me a contract today, which means suddenly I have a nice, new better paid job, and I can afford to move into the lovely flat in the middle of nowhere. But I've started to realise, with all this security I've gotten a little comfortable. My mate Rachel explained to me on Saturday night it's "what normal people do - they work hard, they relax". And where does this leave my musical life and writing? It's in the same place as before - at the end of the day if I want to do it, I will, it's just weird actually having a day job I like, but I mustn't let the comfort blanket of normal living wrap me up to the extent it smothers me.

On a creative note, I thought I had the Edinburgh Fringe show written, but we had a brief run through it at the weekend and whilst it was very 'nice' it certainly doesn't have hit fringe show written all over it, back to the drawing board - again. But I have a brilliant script idea, if I may say so myself, and a little time off work this week (which was supposed to be for packing/moving house but sod it - I can do that in half a day, surely...) called 'Valentines Day' - it's a comedy, and I think it really works. The problem though is that it really works because a lot of it is a true story. Now, the last time I put my own love life on stage was last year's Edinburgh Fringe show - The Knowledge of Beauty, which structurally is still the best thing I've done. It nearly cost me my relationship. Can I really risk doing it again? Ahhh, but it'll work so well...

In the meantime Brighton is confirmed but the scripts are still only at 1st draft stage. Somebody made an approach for my leading actor the other day regarding the Edinburgh Fringe - he was loyal to me, luckily, but I know I need the right material to keep it that way. And I've just said yes to a slot at the Cambridge Comedy Festival via brilliant comedian Hannah Dunleavy whom I got chatting to at the Fringe last year, although it has to be proper comedy - not the comedy drama I write I think, so need to write a whole new show (probably a sketch show) for that. Should be a doddle?

And this weekend we started work on the first of two short films. This one, Remembrance, is a nice little piece about death and poppys and stuff. I've never made a film before, so it was a bit of an experience, and it's amazing how long everything takes - we were working on it from 10am till 4pm and have barely got 5 minutes worth of footage. We're nowhere near done, but it's a learning curve. Once again it served a reminder as to why I'm not an actor (I simply keep on laughing, like a girl) and why Colin, Vaughan and Heather are the most patient people in the world for not giving up on me when things don't always go to plan. There's a picture attached to this post by the way from the filming, just because I'm chuffed that I know how to. We're finishing off the filming in 2 weeks time, maybe it'll see the light of day at some point, or maybe I should just stick to being a writer. Either way, one thing I am sure of is that nothing in this world makes as much sense to me as drumming does, I love drumming, I do.

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