Making the jump

I really enjoyed the Edinburgh Fringe this year; it felt like for the first time (in eleven attempts) I had a show that really, really worked - a show I was comfortable with, like I'd finally found myself. I came back from Scotland to a bunch of gigs which I loved very much, but then I had to go back to the day job. People have often said to me, "I can't believe you have a day job" - this is of course relating to the fact that I have so many other commitments (not the fact that somebody as illogical as me could get one in the first place) but the thing is...I have rent to pay, I have a car, I have quite a nice social life.

Something changed coming back to work this time around; normally I come back from the fringe, having failed miserably, and my office chums are all chatty, and asking questions about how it went...like one of their team had gone into the big scary world of artistic adventures but has returned to be 'normal' again for another twelve months. This time I came back to the office and it didn't feel right...I was energised in my drive to work, I was up for putting in a good shift of spreadsheet stuff but as soon as I walked in I felt drained, my skin felt dry, my expression felt flat. This isn't me, anymore, I couldn't fake it any longer.

Yesterday I resigned from my comfortable, safe little office job, where I type information into a computer all day and hear lots of corporate talk. I work with nice people, I have a desk by the window.

I had to go. When the boss announced it today, the reactions of my colleagues was one of slight confusion and even, well, concern...why would I leave without any set plans? I liked this.

I leave the restrictions of the 9-5 on October 31st. I have tour plans for November/December, I'm not convinced this will be enough to make a living, but I'm also filming three feature-length films, writing a new stage show for Christmas (Paul Richards Will Make You Festive) and a new hour-long comedy show for next year (Paul Richards: Layby). There's a second collection of short stories coming out in two months time and my novel is making good progress. I'll also drum a lot for money, I think, and probably get confused by tax returns. It's a scary new world, but I'm 33...if I don't do this now, I never will. Wish me luck, I'm making the jump.