An Ambulance Stuck In Traffic In London (night 2)

Just back from London, that was a bit of a trickier trip back due to a little confusion with the Northern Line not going all the way to Kings Cross (how dare it), made the final train home by about 2 minutes. Felt very sorry for the poor lady sat next to me because I stank of sweat but lets face it - I'd been running, in a big coat, there's not a lot we can do about it, there's no need to keep pulling those faces. Always a pleasure to bump into Paul Goodwin, chats about relatively obscure indie bands can make a long-ish (and smelly) journey go much quicker. Anyway, the show tonight was pretty much the same as last night - and that's excellent. Kyle and Alexandra are fantastic actors, Michael is a great director, Laura is a brilliant producer, and they're all such wonderfully nice people too. The audience laughed at all the right places for the second time running, and I've decided that I want to move to London.

An Ambulance Stuck In Traffic In London

Tonight I went down to Waterloo to see another performance of my play, An Ambulance Stuck In Traffic, the second production in the capital for this play this year which is weird considering I wrote it three years ago, and nobody liked it originally. It's on for three nights in London this week, courtesy of the nice people behind the April Showers event, and it's lovely to not be a producer, or actor, or anything but the writer for this, and it's even lovelier when the producer is so brilliant and so were the cast (and director). The Horse is an odd space, with the theatre bit being upstairs, and the audience were sat on sofas, it was almost too comfortable, but it works tremendously well. I'm getting fatigued, generally, with 'local' life, and, like my recent RADA adventure, tonight was the reminder of who Paul Richards really is - seeing my work performed by these wonderful actors, in front of an audience who were really into it and not afraid to laugh out loud, it's very inspiring. And, I might add, I didn't even get lost on the tube coming home, which is the first time ever. I'm going back tomorrow, it's the same show, but I just want to be there - it feels like, with the daily routine at work and casting issues for my little local shows dragging me down, I lead a double life with all the other exciting bits going on. I just need to remember the exciting bits a bit more often, it is all worthwhile.

The second performance...

It didn't work tonight, let's be honest about that. I've got a good little cast here, but having built ourselves up a fair bit for Thursday's performance, the 3 day break didn't help at all and we seemed to lose a bit of focus. On a personal level, I was really happy with Thursday's first performance - it was like I was proper actor (almost), but tonight, in front of a bigger audience (including one or two industry types, bugger) it was a fairly harsh reminder that I am often not as good as I think I am. I didn't look at the script in between performances until a quick line-check with Gytha before the show tonight, why do I have the right to think I can just swarm in and make a good show of it? Putting on a show takes time, and comittment, and tonight I was caught out. Structurally, it still worked - and the audience where probably none the wiser, they all laughed at the right times, but we've got a week and a half until the next performance and we need to get the energy up again. There's a really good little show in there, somewhere.

The first performance...

...was actually alright. Amazed we got there - considering the mess the show was in a couple weeks back, but I came off stage rather happy, and almost to the certain extent wondering why I've lost so many nights sleep over it. I got my lines right - but perhaps focusssed too much on the words so some of my physical movements were a little stilted, but one step at a time. The audience were lovely, all laughing at the right time, and the rest of the cast were exceptional, which made things a little easier. If anything, it was almost a dissapointment that there were no crisis to write about here, it was all a bit 'normal'. Still, we've got another 7 or so performances to go, we'll do something terrible at some point I'm sure.

In the meantime the new projects continue to pile in - my work with Jon Orchard is now being extended to a full band line-up which should be fun - especially considering the calibre of musicians he likes to work with, also heard the first mixes of the new Under The Streetlamp album today and I'm extremely happy with them, as well as booking up studio time for session drum work with Cracking Tunes artists Lu and Laura Tapp. Writing wise we've confirmed a slot at the Cambridge Comedy Festival for a new show I've been working on with Alan Morgan called 'The Hedgehog Collective', and of course the much delayed Clowns project is taking greater shape with Katie Gatt and Zoe Meers from Our Painted Nature set to join in the songwriting fun...2010? It's shaping into a pretty good year.

Professional Dignity

I know I've blogged a lot over the last couple of days, but sometimes things need to be said fairly urgently. As an 'artist', whether that be an actor, a musician, a playwright - if you or your work is being performed in public, you always strive for as near perfection as you can get. That can often be killing, because good gigs - and that's those really good gigs where you connect with the audience, where you're playing well, are so rare, but we live for those moments. Often, there are misunderstandings. I write this blog in a rush - and my remarks are often off the cuff, straight after the event itself, and are blurted out, but they are always very honest. It seems some locals at the excellent venue we played at recently, The White Swan in Bluntisham, have taken offence to one or two things I wrote in my 'gig report' of our recent show there. That gig was problematic for us on a practical level, because we had a great deal of issues with our own PA system, and as a result we could barely hear what we were playing. This takes me back to our striving for perfection thing - we didn't enjoy the gig as much as we could have done because ultimately, when we're playing in front of such an enthusiastic audience - we want to do our very best for them, and due to reasons beyond our control we couldn't do that. That is absolutely nothing against the venue, or it's people. Let's be honest - if I had said it was 'the best gig ever' people would have surely felt short changed, because we know that, on a day when technology isn't against us, we can put on a better gig than than the one we did then, and we really, really cared about the White Swan gig because it was a big homecoming for Jon and we wanted to put on the best show we possibly could. If I had said it was 'the best gig ever' it was probably a sign that we didn't care about the venue, or the people watching, when we actually, honestly do.

That really funny act I saw last night

Here's the one:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KM683U6y4nk&feature=related

Surreal times

That was a weird evening, after a fairly bland day at work. Rehearsals for the Brighton show (Cat Food), which opens in Cambridge tomorrow night, were slightly edgy - like suddenly, it's not so fun if you don't know your lines, because the show is tomorrow, and it's not so fun when there's mistakes, because the show is tomorrow. I might add, I've nearly nailed the lines, like the schoolboy swat I am (largely thanks to workmates Audrey, Bryan, Sarah and Matt, who have been helping me at lunch every day for the last week, but now probably won't pay to see the show as they know what happens). That doesn't mean I can actually act though, in my two characters I'm a) myself (which somebody pointed out this evening, a bit sarcastic/rude as well to be honest, thanks), or b) shouty man, which even makes me cringe - although Alan our soundman pointed out that my pacing around reminds him of Leonard Rossiter, which is surely the biggest compliment you can ever pay anybody because he was like, the greatest comedy actor ever? I'm nothing like Leonard Rossiter, but I appreciate Alan's kind words. I feel well supported by most of the people involved with the show, I ain't no actor, but I've done enough work to make sure the show is still a show, which it wasn't about 2 weeks ago. The first performance is tomorrow, I'm trying not to think about it.
After the rehearsal I popped over to the Haymakers in Cambridge where my friend Andy puts on a regular comedy night called Lol-a-thon. It's always a treat - because it's very cheap and you have no idea what to expect - he puts on a lot of acts for three quid, all of whom are generally trying to impress you. Tonight, there was 7 of us in the audience, with nearly as many acts. Alongside the usual stand-up affair though there was something rather incredible - and I'm gutted that I can't remember the name of the duo, but I'll ask Andy (a very good comedian in his own right) what the name of the act was and post a YouTube clip or something in morning - it was genuinely the greatest thing I've ever seen on a stage - 2 men, one with a fake beard, a wig and a moustache made out of gaffer tape who claims to be Matthew Kelly and keeps showing the audience his wonderfully surreal (yet equally simple) paintings, whilst the other chap is a synthesiser playing (although he'd forgotten his batteries) man in a mask who calls himself Nicholas Lyndhurst, or as Matthew Kelly introduces him as, "Rodney from Only Fools and Horses, who you'll also know as Rodney from Goodnight Sweetheart and...Rodney from Parkinson, because he was on that once". My explanations aren't doing it justice, it was the best thing I've ever seen - I was choking with laughter. After that the ever brilliant David Trent followed trying out new material, although heckling from an old Irish man at the back of the pub was a distraction - but one he handled with brilliance, and then - after David's set had finished, they seemed to have an altercation off stage, which we could all hear, and then the final act was a 'comedy' poet who was drunk, accidentally came across as a racist although he clearly wasn't (just as a black man happened to be walking past, just as he was saying how he 'doesn't hate black people' which made everybody feel a bit awkward to say the least) his act died and I went home thinking 'Lol-a-thon' is the best thing to ever happen to Cambridge, and felt privileged to be one of the 7 people who saw all that. Andy is apparently going to rename it 'Cambridge Comedy Hell', whatever it is, it's the best £3 I'll ever spend. Anyway, must sleep, show tomorrow and I look a mess.

Week of the show

I've got my first night in for weeks tonight, and I actually don't know what to do with myself. Okay, so there's plenty to do - I can reply to the mass of emails that's been building up, I can try and find a cast for one of the other projects which has been more than problematic, I can try and learn my lines for Thursday's show...that's probably the most sensible option, actually. Or I could just end up on Facebook, drinking beer and falling asleep to mid-90's sitcoms...I probably deserve this, it's been a stressful few days. My 'other' show, 'Some Plays About Indie Rock' has been struck by disaster right from the start - it was supposed to open this week as a kind of support act to the main show, 'Cat Food', it wasn't essential that it opened this week because it's main purpose was to be performed at the Bury Fringe, which is weeks away yet, but I thought it would be nice to give it another couple airings beforehand to ease the cast in to things. But, having lost 5 cast members, and now the rehearsal space for 3 nights in a row, that's not gonna happen and I've been a bit sweary about the whole thing. Let's just do 'Cat Food' this week then, and worry about the other show next week... Cat Food itself is slightly stressing me, simply because I'm in it, and I'm not used to being 'in' things as such. We've only had 2 rehearsals with me as an actor, there was one last night but it clashed with my soundcheck, and we've only got 2 rehearsals left - tomorrow night (which is the dress rehearsal) and then Thursday (which is the panic rehearsal which will end half an hour before doors open and then we do the show), but I'm reasonably confident about my lines at last, it's taken a week, but most of them are starting to sink in. Well, some of them. Well, a few of them - enough for it to look like a show, at least. Right, where's that beer...

Gig report: The Damsons @ The Portland

Band: The Damsons (acoustic, with Matt Corrall guesting on harmonica)
Venue: The Portland Arms, Cambridge
Date: 19/04/10
Audience: Sparse, polite, quiet
Set: Be True, Going Places, Goodnight Baby, Candy, In The Meantime, Million Day Dreams, Dark Outside
Notes: In what was probably my last gig for The Damsons (I left them in January, but have been helping out with a couple recent shows) we played the Portland in Cambridge which is a small, dark, but lovely little venue with limited air when there's a big crowd. That wasn't a problem for us tonight as there was barely anyone in the room, but those who did make it were nice enough and applauded loudly, which is always a bonus. I played full kit, which makes a nice change these days after my recent percussional activities, but without a bass player I felt very exposed so didn't let go like I wanted to - but all in all probably the best The Damsons have sounded for a good while, and Matt's bluesy playing just added a new dimension to the sound - although it was obvious he should have played a lot more than just the one track with us. From what I caught of the next act, Kyan Kuatois, he was superb (again), and I felt very guilty leaving before the headliners, a signed band called Lawson, played, especially as they let me use their drums and were so friendly about it too.

Gig report: Richard Conway @ The Boot, Histon

Band: Richard Conway (with myself on percussion and some chap called Nick on violin)
Venue: The Boot, Histon
Date: 13/04/10
Audience: Old and folky, but very friendly
Set: A couple of Richard's originals, and some nicely picked alternative covers
Notes: First gig with Rich, whom I've previously played with in Matt Corrall Band and The Damsons. It was basically a gig in a kitchen, the back room of the Boot is a strange location for a gig, but it worked on an intimate level. The audience were old folk music loving types, but despite my reservations regarding the choice of songs they seemed to be open to anything, from Frank Turner to rare Costello. It was a nice gig, I felt too knackered to appreciate it fully - but it was gentle, and each act was nicely introduced by the organiser which made it feel like we were playing a gig in his house in front of his friends and family. The whole room singing along rather boisterously to our version of 'Its The End Of The World' was a nice moment, we could have played tighter but then again we could have rehearsed more than one session, but I enjoyed it all the same.

Me, and my limited voices

Had my second rehearsal tonight for 'Cat Food' since I accidentally ended up playing what is probably the biggest part in it. I'm still terrified - I'm not an actor, end of, but I'm slightly more comfortable now that we've distinguished the different characters I'm playing a little more. For the local MP, Gregory, it's all very easy - the blurb I wrote for the role originally was simply 'lazy and smelly', both of which I have the ability to be on a regular basis, you could argue, but for the old man, Michael, our director Gytha seemed keen on a Cornish accent, especially so as Heather Yeadon - who plays the role of Esther (my 'wife' in the piece) does one really well. I can't do one - I tried, and whilst there was glimmers of it, the bits that weren't glimmers were shocking. So tonight, accepting defeat on my lack of cornishness, even though I was born in Somerset which isn't far off, we tried different voices for me in that character that didn't clash with the smooth-talking, lazy, arrogant Gregory character. I tried seedy, I tried manic Rigsby-esque, and then, as almost by default because I was getting frustrated, I just went and shouted the whole thing. It works, I'm going to shout - and just act really angry, and apparently that's comedy. With that covered, I just need to learn all the many lines by next Thursday's opening performance. I've never had to learn lines before, I have no idea where to start. But I have to - the show has to happen next week, there's no way out of this, we have a poster and everything (see above, it's a lovely design by Gytha's partner, Ollie). I just hope the audience are kind.

After that I drove over to Histon to rehearse with Rich Conway, whom I'm playing a gig with tomorrow night - Rich and his partner treated me well, with pizza and Red Bull, which is always the best recipe for a good performance. I'm looking forward to the gig with him tomorrow, a weird but arguably inspired choice of songs, any set that has 'Blue Chair' by Costello in it should be worthwhile.

Also got told today my play 'An Ambulance Stuck In Traffic' is being performed for 3 nights in a row in London (Waterloo, to be precise) by First Draft theatre company at the end of the month. I'm amazed how this play is still out there, I'm not even trying to promote it anymore, it just seems to be striking a chord or two with the right people. That particular chord being the one about stalking, and death, then.

Acting

Why, when I have so many actors seemingly very keen to be in my productions, do I find myself in this situation? The Brighton show, which now opens in Cambridge next week (a week later than originally planned), now has Paul Richards in what is probably the biggest male role. These are desperate times; I've got to 'become' an actor in the space of about 10 days, with funny accents and everything. Life has taken an awkward, potentially exciting, but potentially disastrous twist...

Panic.

Less than 8 days until the premiere and we've only gone and lost the leading actor. Bollocks. No actor can surely learn such a script in time for the first performance? Are there actually any actors out there anyway? It's been a real struggle finding a cast for the other Bury Fringe show and that's a month away (I've found three quarters of a cast eventually and am now having to re-write the scripts to work with less people), am really clueless as to what we can do now - this time next week the first performance of the play will be done, but who by? It feels like a really bad dream, and when I wake to realise it's actually reality I'm going to swear a hell of a lot.

Easter, Brighton and general disorganisation

Well that's the Easter break out of the way then, 4 days off work which alarmingly drifted by with much left to be done. My home Internet connection is working again which has been a huge bonus, I'm still not sure why it broke or how I fixed it - I came in on Thursday to find a power cut, and by the time I'd popped out to see the excellent Pappy's (formally Pappy's Fun Club) do their thing in Cambridge the power was back on and so was my wireless connection. Baffling, but nice all the same. Anyway, Easter was fun - on Friday morning I met up with good friends Richard and Kerry in Cambridge and we ended up in a music store in Peterborough where I picked up a beautiful set of congas - seriously, they're stunning, almost feel bad hitting them. In between 3 gigs in 3 nights (all detailed below - should have been 4 in 3 but Nathan from Eureka Stockade did his back in) I found the time to play football for the first time in years (and what a mess I was too - I'm so incredibly out of shape), finished writing the radio sitcom ('The Modest Adventures Of Patrick and Cameron') and today I attended the Brighton Fringe rehearsals - which are alarming for the fact that Gytha the director hasn't had the pleasure of having the whole cast in the room at the same time and the show opens next Thursday, but comforting in the fact that Gytha knows what she's doing and I can just stick to being the writer, which is always the safest place for me to be. I still need to get a cast for the other Bury St. Edmunds Fringe show though - I've left it late, I've got a great director in Jo Smythe, I just need to get her some actors to work with on this, this could be really bad if I don't sort it in the next few days...

In the meantime the world is seemingly full of opportunities, the continued offers to write for film, the fact that I currently drum in 7 bands, lovely social occasions on a regular basis, I'm happy enough - okay, so none of the 3 gigs I played this weekend were proper gooduns on any level, but if I can just get these fringe shows back on the right track everything will be marvelous.

Currently listening to: Joe Jackson - Rain, The Dawn Parade, bits of the new Eureka Stockade album which don't have vocals or bass on them yet

Currently reading: still on the Fawlty Towers book at the mo

Currently watching: The Worst Week Of My Life, Auf Wiedersehen Pet

Gig report: Jon Orchard And His Band @ The Carpenters Arms, Cambridge

Band: Jon Orchard And His Band (Jon, me and Neil Cowlan)
Venue: The Carpenters Arms, Cambridge
Date: 03/04/10
Audience: A bunch of scary looking men at the back who hated us and a couple OAP's at the front who couldn't get enough of us
Set: Loads, I think Jon just made it up as we went along
Notes: I spent my works' bonus on a lovely pair of congas (and also a football, because I'm still a kid at the end of the day) and I was really happy to be able to play them so soon - especially with Jon and Neil, as it suits the music. We played the first half to just the guys at the back who didn't want us there, and then the second half to those plus the old couple at the front who were so keen on what we were doing I found their post-gig praise flattering and it almost made it worthwhile. Basically, we played to barely anybody at all and it's remarkable we get paid what we do for this because they clearly didn't make that back at the bar. But we played really well tonight, the second gig as a trio and my third with Jon, and my first that really felt like it was working - I'm understanding the songs better now, and those congas sound remarkable, I could play them for hours. Oh yep - I did tonight actually, it was a long old gig. The Carpenters Arms remains one of the most scary and uncomfortable venues around here, but we need to get over that because we have a residency there.

Gig report: The Damsons @ The Man On The Moon, Cambridge

Band: The Damsons
Venue: The Man On The Moon, Cambridge
Date: 02/04/10
Audience: Young, squeaky, and slightly sarcastic
Set: Be True, Going Places, Goodnight Baby, In The Meantime, Show Me The Way, Million Day Dreams, Dark Outside
Notes: It would be wrong to say this was 'fucking awful', which is what I said backstage after the show (I like the fact the Man On The Moon has a backstage area by the way, although it's pretty much just a storage cupboard with a bench). We were supporting Kyan Kuatois, who everyone has been raving about recently. He's 21, the next big thing, and to be main support should have been a big deal to us, and I'm not ungrateful to Jordan for booking us. But when an artist is 21, the next big thing, and with a charm that young ladies go bizarre at comes an audience full of teenagers, many of whom just look in the lower reaches of teen-hood at that. It felt like there was hundreds of them, swarming around everywhere and making us feel old. The opening act, my old friend and former musical collaborator Alex Harris played his arse off and was practically ignored. We didn't play our arses off as such because we had some major sound issues and played almost hesitantly, and every time Christena (rightly) asked the audience if they were looking forward to seeing Kyan play she was greeted with screams which resembled a boyband gig. We didn't actually go down badly - every song was met with a decent amount of applause, and 'In The Meantime' was met with a really huge amount of appreciation - possibly because it's our best song, but more than likely sarcastic from an audience whom I never felt comfortable performing to. Kyan by the way was excellent, and a nice chap too, even he looked slightly bewildered by the whole thing.